“My addiction started because I was going through a lot of pain from an accident I had in the military, so I was dabbling with pain meds, mostly oxy’s. Then I started looking for something a little bit more because it really wasn’t working. So I stumbled on blues [counterfeit prescription pills]. It started to become harder to find those so I turned to powdered fentanyl. Where I live, I had seen a lot of ambulances responding to overdoses, so I was nervous about it, but it was getting harder to find what I was looking for. I started dabbling with powdered fentanyl, but it was getting to me more and more. I was getting tired. The drugs were working for my pain but it wasn’t working for my life. My life started getting to be bad. I get military and government subsidies that I could live very comfortably on and put a lot away, but a few days after payday, I was out of money. I would pay my rent and my bills right away, but I was broke the rest of the month, so I would have to go to different places to get food. For me, it started to become a chase, I was getting very tired and I was very sad. I didn’t think this is what I wanted from life anymore. I was tired of waking up every morning and wondering where I was going to get the money or the drugs. Once I get the drugs, I had to worry about the next time and the next time, it just got so tiring. I dreaded going to bed and waking up the next day and starting over again.
I talked to friends who were going to Heartview and were on Methadone. I got in my car and was here at 7:45 for a walk-in eval. There were some wonderful people in the insurance department that went above and beyond that day. She took care of everything, I just had to call and talk to a family member and ask for money to pay for the eval. My family member wanted to talk to the staff member because she didn’t want to send me money if this isn’t what I was really doing. I was able to see a provider and took my first dose of methadone and it was the first time in 15 years that I had no pain. I had always been scared about withdrawals, but with methadone I had no withdrawals and had no pain, which is what I had been searching for for years.
From there, every day is a blessing. I wake up and I have a purpose. My family is very proud of me. I didn’t get to see them for almost a whole year and I have lots of grandchildren, I have finally been able to see some of them.
Coming to Heartview is a breath of fresh air. I wake up, I take care of myself. I love coming here, I love my counselor. She is somebody who saved my life. Heartview saved my life. You walk through the door and there are smiles everywhere. Everyone says, “hi” and “how are you doing?” If you are having a problem or anything, it doesn’t matter who it is, they will drop everything that they are doing and talk to you.
I am 120 days sober and I have been able to put money away. I am going to move to a better apartment. I plan to take a few trips and continue with aftercare. I just want to get back to seeing all of my family members, make memories, and enjoy time with my grandkids.
If you have even an inkling in your mind about getting help, if you don’t try, you won’t know. This could be your out. Give it a chance, I know now that Heartview is the place that I needed to be.”
-*Jim, Veteran, 2026 Heartview Graduate
*name has been changed.
